...well sort of. You see, what happened was really the cat's fault, but I'll let it slide cause she's cute. I had to open the sliding glass door in my bedroom to let the cat in from the balcony. And in with the cat flew a large palmetto bug. (For those of you not acquainted with palmetto bugs, they are big ass flying cockroaches.) The thing flew right at my face and damn near hit me in the head! I screamed, the cat yelped and we both ran.
The cat and I gingerly approached the bug in the corner of the room where he landed. Neither of us wanted to get too close. Even the All Mighty Great and Powerful Furball didn't want to tangle with the flying monstrosity that was climbing up the wall in my bedroom. Suddenly my Little Voice chimed in.
Little Voice: Okay, let's look at this from a metaphysical perspective. That's not really a big ass flying cockroach, that's just God pretending to be a big ass flying cockroach. (I often tell myself this about things that are frightening to me.)
Me: Looks like a big ass flying cockroach to me and I think the cat agrees. You're out numbered.
Little Voice: There is nothing to be afraid of. They don't even bite. Just usher him back out the door so he can live peacefully. Remember it's really just God....
Me: Alright already, I get it! It's God pretending to be a cockroach and I should let him live. But how the hell are we going to get God back out onto the balcony where he belongs?
My Little Voice was strangely silent on that query. She wasn't that keen on getting near "God" either. The cat looked up at me as if to say "I have an idea." I had one too. I snuck past the creature on the wall and went down stairs for the bug spray.
The Raid spray took care of things in short order and I scooped up the remains and flushed them down the toilet. Next time God shouldn't fly so close to my head looking like a big ass cockroach.
Thursday, November 13, 2008
Monday, November 10, 2008
Kitty Porn
Just thought I would delight you all with a cute pic of my fur baby. This is my cat Cozy. When I snapped this pic she was trying to see what this whole web surfing craze was all about. I think she might have been surfing for kitty porn, but who knows? I didn't ask and she didn't tell.
Thursday, November 6, 2008
How To Get Rid of A Guy Quickly and For Good
Make his phone number one of your computer passwords so you can remember it. That'll do it. He'll drop off the face of the earth and never call again. Better than tattooing his name on your ass and a lot less painful.
Gahhhh!!!!
Gahhhh!!!!
Tuesday, November 4, 2008
New Perspective On An Old Idea
Last week, I had an amazing conversation with, of all people, my boss. Now just to clarify, my boss is one of the most intelligent people I know and he has a different point of view on a lot of things. When I mentioned that I would like Friday off to go and vote early, he told me I was ruining the excitement of election day.
"Huh?" I quizzed, with a lot of eye blinking. I didn't get it. How could voting EARLY ruin election day?
He explained that in his home country of Congo (you may have read of the unrest there recently in the news), there are no elections. He did recall one election when he was in college, but he said that because he and other college students voted against the incumbent President, they were beaten when they walked out of the polling booth and their ballots were ripped to shreds. But for the most part, there are no elections. Instead, they tend to have wars.
He talked about what a privilege it is to go and vote on the one day that is designated for voting and how we should never take Election Day for granted. He believes it should be national holiday.
After hearing his story of the one Congolese election he did vote in and hearing him describe how he gets up early on Election Day to be the first voter at his polling place. I was inspired. The man actually gets up at the crack of dawn and celebrates going to vote. What I looked at as an inconvenience of having to stand in line (really early), he sees as an honor and a duty as an American.
So, being inspired by his enthusiasm, I waited to vote until this morning. I got up very early and stood in a very short line with my neighbors to do my civic duty. I didn't feel quite as excited as my boss seems to (could be cause I'm not a morning person), but it felt good to cast my ballot and know that regardless of the outcome, my vote will count. I knew that I wouldn't get beaten up when I left the polling place and life would go on with out a civil war, no matter what. Now THAT is something to get excited about.
"Huh?" I quizzed, with a lot of eye blinking. I didn't get it. How could voting EARLY ruin election day?
He explained that in his home country of Congo (you may have read of the unrest there recently in the news), there are no elections. He did recall one election when he was in college, but he said that because he and other college students voted against the incumbent President, they were beaten when they walked out of the polling booth and their ballots were ripped to shreds. But for the most part, there are no elections. Instead, they tend to have wars.
He talked about what a privilege it is to go and vote on the one day that is designated for voting and how we should never take Election Day for granted. He believes it should be national holiday.
After hearing his story of the one Congolese election he did vote in and hearing him describe how he gets up early on Election Day to be the first voter at his polling place. I was inspired. The man actually gets up at the crack of dawn and celebrates going to vote. What I looked at as an inconvenience of having to stand in line (really early), he sees as an honor and a duty as an American.
So, being inspired by his enthusiasm, I waited to vote until this morning. I got up very early and stood in a very short line with my neighbors to do my civic duty. I didn't feel quite as excited as my boss seems to (could be cause I'm not a morning person), but it felt good to cast my ballot and know that regardless of the outcome, my vote will count. I knew that I wouldn't get beaten up when I left the polling place and life would go on with out a civil war, no matter what. Now THAT is something to get excited about.
Tuesday, October 28, 2008
Tripping Along
Ever notice how sometimes things work out perfectly when it wasn't even something you'd planned? Maybe it was even something you planned against! I've been taking notice of these more in my life recently. Some of them are startling.
This week I found out that a job I applied for last summer (and did not get) is being eliminated in the 10% across the board cut my office is taking. Thank God I didn't get the job because the person who did will soon be unemployed.
Recently, I received a letter from the IRS stating that I turned in my 2006 return late and they were assessing me (and my former business partner $400). I turned the issue over to my CPA who sent in the proof that I had not filed late, after all, and did not owe the IRS anymore money. Instead, after he reviewed my return, he realized it needed to be amended and the IRS owes ME an additional $2800. Sweet!
Lately, I've been lamenting and beating myself up about the money I took out of my mutual fund a while back to pay for a few unexpected expenses. I was feeling rather undisciplined about the fact that I have not put all of the money back. Instead, I was putting money in savings. Well, its a darn good thing the money was in savings because when the market dove this month, so did my mutual fund. If I'd put the money back in my fund, I'd have lost it and all of my scrimping and saving would have felt like it was in vain.
Even though some days I feel kind of like a bungling idiot, life still just seems to work out. Go figure. Maybe ignorance really is bliss.
This week I found out that a job I applied for last summer (and did not get) is being eliminated in the 10% across the board cut my office is taking. Thank God I didn't get the job because the person who did will soon be unemployed.
Recently, I received a letter from the IRS stating that I turned in my 2006 return late and they were assessing me (and my former business partner $400). I turned the issue over to my CPA who sent in the proof that I had not filed late, after all, and did not owe the IRS anymore money. Instead, after he reviewed my return, he realized it needed to be amended and the IRS owes ME an additional $2800. Sweet!
Lately, I've been lamenting and beating myself up about the money I took out of my mutual fund a while back to pay for a few unexpected expenses. I was feeling rather undisciplined about the fact that I have not put all of the money back. Instead, I was putting money in savings. Well, its a darn good thing the money was in savings because when the market dove this month, so did my mutual fund. If I'd put the money back in my fund, I'd have lost it and all of my scrimping and saving would have felt like it was in vain.
Even though some days I feel kind of like a bungling idiot, life still just seems to work out. Go figure. Maybe ignorance really is bliss.
Friday, October 24, 2008
Free Day Friday
I think I've mentioned before that occasionally, I give myself a free day, where all I do is act on my intuition and I don't plan anything for the entire day. If I feel like eating ice cream for breakfast, I do it. If I feel like walking to work and not driving, I follow that that thought and do it.
You wouldn't believe how freeing, yet how difficult it can be! NOT planning is not my initial reaction. I want to know what I am doing, where I am going ,and what the plan for the day is. However, I'm finding that planning is sometimes a futile effort. There is a season for everything and today is my season for not planning anything and just going with the flow.
So, my cyberpeeps, the challenge for today is to give yourself a free day. Don't plan anything and see where the day takes you. There might just be a huge surprise waiting for you somewhere! Let me know how it goes in the comments section!
You wouldn't believe how freeing, yet how difficult it can be! NOT planning is not my initial reaction. I want to know what I am doing, where I am going ,and what the plan for the day is. However, I'm finding that planning is sometimes a futile effort. There is a season for everything and today is my season for not planning anything and just going with the flow.
So, my cyberpeeps, the challenge for today is to give yourself a free day. Don't plan anything and see where the day takes you. There might just be a huge surprise waiting for you somewhere! Let me know how it goes in the comments section!
Wednesday, October 22, 2008
If You Need Me, I'll Be In Rehab.......
..............reading and listening to my ipod. Or at least trying to recover from using them. Apparently, according to this article, reading and listening to music are true addictions. Who knew?!?! I figure since the "in" crowd is all going to rehab to recover from everything from drug and alcohol addiction to an addiction to racial/homophobic slurs, then I should be able to go into rehab for music and reading addictions. Right? Who's with me? But, I don't want to go into regular rehab where they make you clean the toilets and stuff. I want to go to one out in California where you get massages, yoga classes and gourmet meals. Wonder if I could talk my HMO into paying for that?
I don't have the inner ear issue associated with a reading addiction, but I do spend an awful lot of money on books (and music!), so maybe I should check in for a shopping addiction too?! Hey, do they let you stay longer in the rehab/resort if you have several addictions?!
I'm so confused! I think I need some chocolate. OMG, could I be addicted to that too?!? For the love of Pete! No wonder I'm still single. With all of my issues, I'm surprised I make it out of my lounge chair, put my book and my Hershey bar down , and take off my ipod to go into work. Hmmm, maybe if I didn't make it to work I could get sent to one of those rehab/resort places..........
I don't have the inner ear issue associated with a reading addiction, but I do spend an awful lot of money on books (and music!), so maybe I should check in for a shopping addiction too?! Hey, do they let you stay longer in the rehab/resort if you have several addictions?!
I'm so confused! I think I need some chocolate. OMG, could I be addicted to that too?!? For the love of Pete! No wonder I'm still single. With all of my issues, I'm surprised I make it out of my lounge chair, put my book and my Hershey bar down , and take off my ipod to go into work. Hmmm, maybe if I didn't make it to work I could get sent to one of those rehab/resort places..........
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